2012 Cassandra Report III: Predictions 21 – 34

My unsolicited, uninformed, and unpopular thoughts on foreign events in 2012 (for everywhere but the financial/socialist rabbit hole that is Europe):

  1. Vladimir Putin, because he is Darth Vader, will retain power.
  2. Kim Jung-un, because he is the third son in a line of power whores, will retain power.
  3. Large numbers of Americans and Europeans will incrementally decide that China, which appears to own everything, isn’t quite as stable as it seems. As soon as they realise this they’ll have a collective involuntary bowel movement. The rest of us already knew we were screwed so it’ll be just another day.
  4. Guantanamo will remain open. Nobody will care unless a Republican wins the White House.
  5. American troops (or some form of euphemism that means “mercenary”) will still be fighting in Afghanistan through most of 2012. Nobody will care unless a Republican wins the White House.

Foreign Events (In The Progressive Utopian Bliss That Is The EU):

  1. Several European states will get new Prime Ministers. If three or more progressives win, the phase “European Spring” will be on trumpeted in the New York Times. If three or more conservatives win, the phrase “Meltdown” will be used. Meanwhile the nations in the real “Arab Spring” will be busily killing dissidents and non-believers.
  2. Europe’s slow burn was demographically written in stone years ago and it’s still playing out exactly as expected. Things will get ugly because apparently folks would rather let it play out in full technicolor than do anything at all to adapt. If you’re watching from a distance, make popcorn. If you’re living there…uh…good luck.
  3. Annoying people which have spent most of my life telling me how awesome Europe is and why America should be more like it will suddenly find some other target of adulation. Anywhere with socialised medicine will be a good candidate but it’ll be increasingly hard to find such nations that don’t have current riots in their capital cities.
  4. The European common currency, which chains drowning and strong swimmers together, will persist even as everyone has a theory about how to deep six it. I’m not sure what will happen after 2012 but watching Brussels work though the mess they’ve created will be like seeing a sausage made back into a dead cow.
  5. Everyone who’s ever had to kick a lazy relative off the couch will sympathise with Germany. Everyone who’s ever camped on a friend’s couch will sympathise with Portugal, Ireland, Italy, Greece, and Spain.
  6. The oil based socialist utopia of Venezuela will continue it’s slide into oblivion.
  7. Haiti, which was a shithole before its earthquake, will continue to be a shithole.
  8. Japan, which had an efficient and orderly society before its earthquake, will continue recovering at an impressive rate. I will put a Japanese bumper sticker on my Honda and set my Chevy on fire.
  9. Somalia, which didn’t have an earthquake, will keep developing it’s pirate based economy.

I could be wrong… wouldn’t that be great!

Here’s the link to Cassandra Report I.
Here’s the link to Cassandra Report II.

About Adaptive Curmudgeon

I will neither confirm nor deny that I actually exist.
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7 Responses to 2012 Cassandra Report III: Predictions 21 – 34

  1. bluesun says:

    Yes, yes, double yes. I’ve pretty much decided that I’m going to 1) put as much of my money into paying off student loans as possible (yes, yes, I know, but don’t worry, shouldn’t take more than half a year), 2) convert the rest into .308 and 9mm, and 3) I got a real nifty popcorn popper for Christmas, which I imagine will be used quite a bit.

    To paraphrase one of my favorite musicians, “At least the revolution should be amusing.”

  2. Pakkinpoppa says:

    I for one welcome our new pirate ruling class. The documentary film about it will be rated “Aaaarrrrr…..”

    Unfortunately I think most, if not all, of your predictions are spot on, and therefore I will continue my hobbies of accumulating food, gear, and filling .30 caliber steel cans with .22 LR.

    Does this make me loyal reader number 7? Or do I need to make another dozen comments to qualify?

  3. C. S. P. Schofield says:

    Regarding Europe, the Euro, and related idiocies;

    When the European Union was brand spanking new, and the Euro only existed in electronic transactions, I was over heard to opine that I would believe in the stability of the European Union after they had fought their Civil War, and not before. I was asked how that Civil War would split, and suggested that Germany and friends against France and friends looked most likely. Whereupon a Liberal friend of mine asked “Do you really think France hasn’t forgiven Germany for WWII?”

    “Sweetie,” I said, “France hasn’t forgiven Germany for siding with Wellington against Napoleon.”

  4. urishkish says:

    @ AC: Hope you’re wrong, but suspect that most will come to pass in some form or another.
    @ c.s.p.: It will be a sad day when the Civil War between the Euros breaks out after all the USA did to save or rebuild them after the big 2. I will also be hard pressed as to which side to favor. “…Wellington against Napoleon” Love that.
    Oh, one more question Mr. AC (doing my best Columbo impression), Is the use of British spelling part of your OPSEC? Like one of your commenters said: “You’ll probably cost me a new keyboard one of these days.”

  5. Joe in PNG says:

    A perdiction for my other home:
    Papua New Guinea will elect a government full of self serving corrupt fat cats that will try to sell off their resources to foreigners for pennies on the dollar. In other words, pretty much what they have now.

  6. Pingback: 2012 Cassandra Report IV: Predictions 35-45 | The Adaptive Curmudgeon's Blog

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