Category Archives: Homesteading

Here’s a useful homesteading hint; once a galvanized waterer freezes you’ll tear your spine out trying to bust it open it to chip away the ice and add more water. I have nicknamed galvanized waterers “the spittoons of Satan” and am forwarding my chiropractic bills to the chickens. Continue reading →

“I am man.” I addressed the tree. “I have an oversized turbo charged simian brain. It has one purpose…to dominate everything. I’m on the top of the food chain because I damn well belong there. I have a powersaw. I have opposable thumbs. My species invented beer, nuclear weapons, and ice hockey. We cannot be defeated. I’m going to find your weakness, I’m going to exploit it, and I’m going to win!” Continue reading →

Curmudgeon Compound has an impressive TV antenna which came with the place.  I never hooked it up because fuck television! I’m lazy. The past few mornings a woodpecker has been earnestly hammering away at the tall metal support pole.  I’ve … Continue reading →

When you tinker with homesteading you soon realize that mother nature is a steamroller and you are a worm on the road of life. That’s not to say that mother nature hates you; only that there is no definition of “no mercy” quite like the elements. Continue reading →

Homesteading is a mysteriously complex activity; beset with obscure and improbably strange challenges.  There comes a time when your hands are half frozen and you’ve used your last match and you think to yourself that any activity involving a propane … Continue reading →

Flour is the victim of historic oddities which have made something simple into something complex. I blame the whole thing on Wonder Bread and early 20th century urbanisation. (I told you it was boring!) Continue reading →

You’re going to need salt, yeast, flour, and gluten. Each of these things is so earth-shatteringly cheap that you should buy a lot of them. Why? Because they store forever (almost) and it sucks to go to grocery stores. Also you might want to make bread during the zombie apocalypse. Continue reading →

Don’t let these objects commingle with the rest of the measuring devices in the kitchen. These are yours. These are for your full assault on the bread monopoly that’s keeping it’s boot heel on our collective neck. Like weaponry, your bread tools are now mission critical implements which should be properly stored where you and only you can access them. Continue reading →